Miami Beach, Fl. - by Erica Bazoombas - Frustrated by his inability to gain support among fellow Republicans, former Florida Governor Charlie Crist changed party affiliation to Democrat last week. And SPN Headlines has now learned that the silver-haired sleaze also traveled to Oslo, Norway and underwent sexual re-assignment surgery in hopes of building a more diverse base.
Crist, known for changing positions on crucial issues such as health care, abortion and iPhone vs. Android, told SPN Headlines, "I am the only politician who can now look at issues from the perspective of both a man and a woman." The flip-flopping floozy added that she was surprised at first with some of the changes. "I woke up this morning, reached down to scratch my balls, and.....well let's just say it was real WTF moment."